Wow I haven't even been here in over a year. I guess I came to finally say I'm pretty much done with deviantart, but I guess you all knew that from the lack of updates. I have like carpal tunnel in my wrist and it has killed my drawing wants lol. It also killed my video game obsessiveness for most of the summer, I was also on a massive hiatus. Also school. And trying to find housing. Life is hard right now. I guess in the future I might draw more, but I don't know about now. I just don't feel like drawing. I kinda want to get a tablet and I think it might help with some of my problems with drawing/painting tbh. Its hard on me doing all the little layers with colored pencils. I've been taking care my succulent and cacti collection more and I guess that fills the void a little bit, for doing something creative. Making arrangements, potting them up, etc. Anyways, I guess good bye for now my 1 watcher. If I ever come back or start on a different platform I'll link it here. But I don't even know if I will draw. I've taken a whole bunch of art classes/art history and it kinda turned my whole art world upside down. I don't even know what direction I want to take my art, or even do it professionally. I'm going to get my degree in art history because I want to work in museums.
I've always struggled with my art and people saying "It doesn't mean anything! When I was younger and would draw a lot of dragons. I stopped drawing dragons and would draw portraits, and that was better for them. I didn't dislike portraits, but I still wanted to draw dragons.
I still get those comments lol. With all the deer I draw. "What does it mean?" "Your art is pretty decorative!" (instead of emotionally based)
Why do I have to draw things emotionally charged all the time? I can't. Its hard on me emotionally. Why can't I draw something and just have it be pretty? Why do they have to mean anything? Sometimes I just need to paint a color or a cute idea.
Even though we are all born right after the abstract period, we are pretty much children of the renaissance and when people think of all the french, venetian, and dutch masters they think that is the the highest/best form of art. Naturalistic=better. Its hard to compete with that idea. Sometimes all I want to do is draw squares on my piece of paper. I can't bring myself to make forms. A lot of us are classical thinkers and its hard to please. I guess that what I've been struggling with lately and I'll leave you all with those thoughts. I'll still be drawing my shapes on a piece of paper though. Because fuck what other people think. :P